Yesterday We Were Parents

© 2000 by Michelle Keim,
Commander of Royersford VFW Post 6341 in PA.


U.S.S. Cole

Yesterday we were parents
We were called mom and dad
I sat and watched the news today
How times over there turned bad

A fear welled up inside me
A chill ran down my spine
The USS Cole was bombed
And she held a son of mine

Fear ripped through my heart
As I searched for any news
Part of me not wanting to know
Part needing to know the truth

I called up my husband
And told him what I heard
He rushed right home to hold me
Not able to say a word

We started calling the Navy
Our fate was in their hands
It was her who took him to
That Eastern foreign land

It was his call to duty
To honor, serve and protect
A call to duty so many of us
Now seem too easily neglect

We have to call back later
No answers can they provide
Don't they realize how that response
Tears me up inside

Now there is a number
For all the "next of kin"
That phrase will forever haunt me
And make my blood run thin

…Yesterday we were mom and dad
for right now we still don't know
if we'll ever hear those names
or drown in heartbreak and sorrow…

Amazing Grace

By John Newton

"Amazing grace, how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me,
I once was lost, but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.

'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
And grace my fears relieved.
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares,
I have already come.
'Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far,
And grace will lead me home."

This beautiful hymn's author, John Newton, a captain on a slave ship in the 1700s, wrote the words to it after renouncing his profession and turning to religion.

Memorial Day

Relatives and others traditionally place flags near veterans' headstones on Memorial Day

Memorial Day is a United States public holiday that takes place on the last Monday of May. It was formerly known as Decoration Day. This holiday commemorates US service men and women who died in military service to their country. It began first to honor Union soldiers who died during the American Civil War. After World War I, it expanded to include those who died in any war or military action. Today, many Americans use Memorial Day weekend to also honor family members who have passed away. Church services on the Sunday prior to Memorial Day may include a reading of the names of members who have died during the previous 12 months.

Many people observe this holiday by visiting cemeteries and memorials. A National Moment of Remembrance takes place at 3 PM. Another tradition is to fly the US Flag at half-staff from dawn until noon local time.

People originally observed Memorial Day on May 30 and many advocate doing so again.

History

Following the end of the Civil War, many communities set aside a day to mark the end of the war or as a memorial to those who had died. Some of the early cities creating a memorial day include Charleston, South Carolina, Boalsburg, Pennsylvania, Richmond, Virginia, and some two dozen other cities and towns. These observances eventually coalesced around Decoration Day honoring the Union dead and the several Confederate Memorial Days.

"Decoration Day" was proclaimed on May 5, 1868 by General John Logan of the Grand Army of the Republic, and was observed for the first time on May 30 of the same year. The tombs of fallen Union soldiers were decorated in remembrance of this day.

Many of the states of the U.S. South refused to celebrate Decoration Day due to lingering hostility towards the Union Army, which it was commemorating. Many Southern States did not recognize Memorial Day until after World War I, and even after continued to have a separate Confederate Memorial Day, with the date varying from state to state.

The alternative name of "Memorial Day" was first used in the 1882, but did not become more common until after World War II, and was not declared the official name by Federal law until 1967.

The official birthplace of Memorial Day is Waterloo, New York. The village was credited with being the birthplace because it had observed the day each year since its first observance, and because it's likely that the friendship of Gen. John Murray, a distinguished citizen of Waterloo, and General Logan, whose order calling for the day to be observed each year helped spread the event nation wide, was a key factor in its growth.

In 1971, President Richard Nixon declared Memorial Day a national holiday to be held on the last Monday in May.

Related Holidays

Unsurprisingly given its origin in the American Civil War, Memorial Day is not a holiday outside the US (although it coincides with holidays of different origin in some other countries). In the countries of the Commonwealth, and also in France and Belgium, similar observances are held on or around Remembrance Day, on November 11. This date is marked as Veterans Day (formerly Armistice Day) in the US. The distinction is that Memorial Day honors the U.S. soldiers who died in the wars, while Veterans Day honors those who survived.

Grubstakes Day is a holiday celebrated on the Saturday before Memorial Day in the town of Yucca Valley, California.

Links

• In Memory of Our Honored Dead
• History of Memorial Day
• Open Directory Project: Memorial Day

This article is licensed under the GNU Free Documentation License. It uses material from the Wikipedia article "Memorial Day".

Star Wars, The End of an Era

I haven't seen this film yet but Lady Liberty writes an excellent review and gives this feature 3 out of 4 stars. Here is a short excerpt from the review.

The bottom line where Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith is concerned is that the franchise is going out on a high note. The effects are awesome, and the story is just what we've waited to hear even though much of it is probably not what we've wanted to hear. In fact, whatever the script's other flaws, the evolution of Anakin Skywalker to Darth Vader is heart-rending and a tale well worth the telling. Read the complete review.

1977-2005
click to get your own poster

Why Make Your Bed?

This is a question that every kid asks their Mom at some point, "Mom why do we have to make our bed if were just going to sleep in it again tonight?" Well if this study by Kingston U. can be believed you might be better off folding the blankets down.

Neatniks, cover your eyes. New research from Kingston University in the United Kingdom has concluded that an unmade bed is not only unappealing to the eyes, but also unappealing to house dust mites, which are thought to cause asthma and other allergies.

The average bed can be home to as many as 1.5 million house dust mites, and when a bed is made up, it traps moisture in the sheets and mattress--ideal conditions for those mites. But the bugs apparently have a harder time surviving in the drier conditions of an unmade bed, reports the BBC News.

The big takeaway: Since dust mites are a leading cause of allergies and asthma, keeping your bed unmade could keep you healthier. Read more here and here.

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Adopt a Platoon Soldier Support Effort

Crossposted from A Soldier's Perspective

You are cordially invited to attend the 1st annual, Thank You, We Know You’re Out There concert and rally. Come out and show your support for our deployed Armed Services personnel and appreciation for the service given to our country by our honored Veterans.

If you’re anywhere near Maryland, please show your support for both our soldiers and the fine organization that supports them, Adopt A Platoon. Even if you can’t go, but want to support this cause, purchase tickets and donate the money. Click HERE to purchase tickets.

Boycott Hanoi Jane

I was requested to pass this along from some veterans that Jane Fonda is an unapologetic traitor and that her newest movie should be boycotted. Here is their statement:

On May 13, the movie, Monster-in-Law, starring Jennifer Lopez, Michael Vartan and Jane Fonda was released nationally.

PLEASE boycott this movie in protest of the TRAITOR Jane Fonda.

If the movie is a box office flop, other stars and movie studios will think twice about appearing with or casting Hanoi Jane in future films.

We can make a difference and this is one way we can let the film industry know we will not pay our hard earned money to see a TRAITOR who disrespected our POW's, causing them great mental and physical pain, slapped America in the face and refuses to apologize for her actions star in a film.

What Jane Fonda did during the Vietnam War went way beyond just protesting the war and is unforgivable and more than "regrettable", to use her words from a recent "60 Minutes" show.

PLEASE send this to all on your e-mail list, especially military veterans and active duty military personnel.

Graphics by Doc

The Eagle and the Serpents

Such discord now ‘tween you and us,
Mainstream Media and populace:
You envenom all that we hold dear,
And revel in those things we fear.
You denigrate our national pride
Taking always now the others’ side.
A Media mamba, a poisonous pest
That lurks within our Eagle’s nest.

You arrogant adders puffed with pride,
We know truth’s on our Eagle’s side;
And care not what you snakes declare,
We’ve had it with your venomous fare.
Our Eagle soars above your wrath,
Your tortured, twisted serpents’ path.
From your low crawl, you fail to see,
Our Eagle strikes have set men free.

Now the Eagle from his lofty post,
Looks down upon your hissing host,
Who poison every good intent,
With noxious toxins you invent.
Like diamondbacks you loudly rattle,
Strike fear in those you deem but cattle;
But your cattle now look to the sky,
See the Eagle soaring, and know you lie.

Can you Media serpents win this fight?
Bring our Eagle down from newfound height?
No longer now caged up by you,
Only negative news to shape our view.
The Internet set our Eagle free,
Now we can hear, now we can see.
A Mainstream Media hissing lies,
Spitting blinding venom in our eyes.

Our Eagle’s spied you false purveyors,
Just negative fools and foul naysayers.
The Eagle knows now he is right,
That he’s with honor in this fight.
And despite your biting fanged attacks,
He’ll land upon your serpent backs;
An image that should give you pause:
A thrashing snake in Eagle’s claws.

Russ Vaughn

Woman Isn't Liable for Injuring Boyfriend During Sex

My only comment is Ouch!

By MICHAEL KUNZELMAN, Associated Press Writer

BOSTON -- A woman isn't legally responsible for injuries her boyfriend suffered while they were having consensual sex more than a decade ago, a state appeals court ruled Monday.

The man, identified only as John Doe in court papers, filed suit against the woman in 1997, claiming she was negligent when she suddenly changed positions, landed awkwardly on him and fractured his penis.

The man underwent emergency surgery in September 1994, 'endured a painful and lengthy recovery' and has suffered from sexual dysfunction that hasn't responded to medication or counseling, the appeals court said.

Although the woman may have exposed her boyfriend to 'some risk of harm,' the three-judge panel said her conduct during the sexual encounter wasn't 'wanton or reckless' and can't support a lawsuit." Read the rest here.

Mystery Rock Sneaks into Corn Field

CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa -- A big rock has spouted in a farm field in Cedar Rapids, creating a big mystery. It wasn't there last year. 'We picked the corn last fall and the field was fine. We came back this spring to do some field work, and this big rock was here,' said Bob Taylor, 51, a hired man for Balderston Farms of Central City.

That was four weeks ago.

Taylor, who guesstimated the boulder at 15,000 pounds, said maybe it was a meteorite.

But the rock is clean, not burned. It's sitting on the field, not in a crater."

Taylor said the rock didn't rise out of the ground as stones tend to do when a field is plowed because it's too big for that.

Taylor wondered if the boulder rolled off a truck that was hauling it to a housing development across the street.

One fence post leans a little toward the rock, as if it might have been grazed by the boulder as it rolled off a truck, down the embankment and into the field.

Still, the clues for that scenario don't seem real evident, either.

"Why didn't it make some kind of indentation from the road to here?" Taylor asked. "That's the mystery."

There are scratch marks on the boulder, as if it was lifted by a machine. But it's unlikely someone plopped the rock in the field with a crane in preparation for another housing development.

Randy Balderston has been renting the ground to farm for 15 years, and nobody told him or Taylor about it.

"Nobody's said anything about it," Taylor said. "Nobody's claimed it. Nobody's moved it."

For now, Taylor said, they'll farm around it.

"I can't lift it," he said. "We figure, whoever owns it, a contractor or whatever, will come back for it."
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Information from: The Gazette, http://www.gazetteonline.com/

Two birds…one stone

By Russ Vaughn

While driving through El Paso recently, I heard a caller to a talk-radio program laughingly suggest that we should embed Army recruiters within the frontline ranks of the Border Patrol so that they could sign up illegal immigrants and thus eliminate the Army’s current recruiting deficits. I laughed, as did the host of the show, and said to my wife, “Hey, that’s not a bad idea.” As I continued driving eastward across the desert expanse of West Texas, I began to think more seriously about what the ramifications of such a policy might be. When we went through the Border Patrol checkpoint near Sierra Blanca, I told my wife, “You know, that fellow was joking but in fact, he may truly be onto something.”

Think about it, folks. We have a serious illegal immigration problem on our southern border. We also have a problem recruiting troops for the combat arms sectors in our military, all while we have this steady flow of stalwart young men sneaking into our country seeking a better way of life. From the benefit of six years active duty in the 101st and 82d Airborne Divisions, I know that Hispanics volunteer in disproportionate numbers for hazardous duty such as jumping out of airplanes and special operations. American Hispanics have a long and honorable tradition of serving in the Marine Corps with multiple generations having been Leathernecks. These volunteers have a warrior instinct that serves our nation well, as exemplified by Special Forces Medal of Honor winner, Roy Benavides, a native of my own South Texas.

So why don’t we put this warrior ethic to work for us? Let’s follow the jesting suggestion of the caller to the radio show and put some our sharpest, most impressive, Hispanic Army and Marine Corps non-coms in Border Patrol stations to interview physically fit illegal immigrants picked up by Border Patrol agents. Let those hapless young illegals see what determined Hispanic men can become in this country. Screen them thoroughly and offer the best of them an opportunity to become United States citizens by serving a four-year enlistment in Army or Marine Corps combat arms organizations. For you civilians not conversant in military terms, that means putting them in those units at the point of America’s military spear, where the fighting and the dying are done. Why combat arms units? Because no one who has stood shoulder-to-shoulder with a fellow soldier or marine under fire will ever have a greater appreciation for what this country is, what it stands for and the opportunities it offers.

How do we do it? Create two special training facilities, one at Fort Bliss in far West Texas, and the other at Camp Pendleton on the west Coast, where we put these volunteers through a four-week crash course of English with an emphasis on Army or Marine Corps terminology. Then, put them through an eight to twelve-week, basic training course to teach them fundamental military skills, conducted by bilingual non-coms, all the while, further honing their English language skills. Upon graduation from basic training, they should possess sufficient English to be able to take advanced specialty training with their American counterparts and then go on to assignments in combat arms units around the world. Perhaps we could even establish a buddy system wherein serving American Hispanic troops could volunteer to mentor these alien volunteers until they are fully assimilated.

And what’s in it for the illegals? How about a good paying, full-benefits job, which is what they come here seeking but seldom ever find. How about a job that teaches them responsibility and gives them skills usable as productive American citizens following their military service? The modern military is very supportive of those wishing to continue their education. Could we not ensure that these young soldiers obtain the equivalent of a high school GED during their enlistments so that they would be discharged back into civilian life with at least a basic education? Would not such men be able to contribute more to the economy of this nation than they do now as illiterate, minimum wage laborers, themselves and their families a drain our already insufficient health care infrastructure?

Nay Sayers may argue these young men would be foreign mercenaries; I would counter that objection by saying that yes we are paying them to fight, but the coin of the realm is not just American dollars but dignity and honor, and a future to which they would not otherwise aspire. Offer them the opportunity to serve honorably as warriors and defenders of the nation they seek to inhabit instead of commending them to an unending future of degrading, undignified, menial labor. Oh, yes, and let us not forget citizenship, hard earned, legitimate citizenship in the nation they have served. Give them two years in the military to prove themselves worthy and then grant them full citizenship. Now they are no longer illegals; they have a vested interest in the nation’s wellbeing because they have served this country, defended this country as warriors, and it is now their country to cherish and maintain.

Think about it, folks. If you agree this concept has merit, copy this piece and send it to your representatives in Congress.

Russ Vaughn is the Poet Laureate of The American Thinker.

Love is in the air-Science too!

by K.A.Cassimally

Ah… love! What a wonderful thing. The meaning of life itself, isn’t it? Artists, poets and play writers have made the greatest progress in humanity’s understanding of love. So what’s love doing in a science column? Well lately scientists have managed to get themselves included in the restricted group of love-explainers.

Scientists now think that love is nothing else but a series of chemical reactions in people.

If you are in love with someone then you are also in love with that person’s genes subconsciously. More surprising still-if there is anything more astonishing that this last ‘fact’-is that not only do your eyes work when you see a perfect partner but so does your nose-and of course heart. Smell apparently plays an important role in the attraction between two persons. You are in fact attracted to a person who is more like your own parents not only physically speaking but also olfactory speaking. This chosen person of your heart is also the chosen person of your nose!

Many external appearances will prove that you are well and truly in love. Flushed cheeks, racing heart beat and clammy hands are only a few examples. ‘Inside’ the body though, there are other definite signs that Cupid has passed by.

Helen Fisher of Rutgers University is one of the most respected researchers in the field. She proposed that people fall in love in 3 different stages.

Stage 1: Lust
Lust is driven by the sex hormones testosterone and oestrogen. Testosterone, as many readers might have thought, is not only found in men. In fact it plays a major role in women’s sex drive.

Stage 2: Attraction
This second stage is the classic love part often featured in romantic comedies. When people are in stage 2, they lose their appetite and often need less sleep. They instead find it more interesting to daydream about you-know-who.

During this stage, the body secretes a number of hormones. One of these hormones is serotonin. It is one of love’s most important chemicals and it may actually make people temporarily insane.

Stage 3: Attachment
If you have the guts to talk to that person, then you may well have entered this stage. If a relationship is going to last, this attachment process is the last stage.

Attachment is a longer lasting commitment and is the bond that keeps couples together when they start having children.

But are all these stuff really important at all? Scientists think so. By understanding the paths that regulate social attachments, scientists might be able to deal with some people’s inability to form relationships. Some people even see love being guaranteed in the future generation because love will be chemically provided: in pills.

Well when we say that love is madness, it’s sort of true literally speaking. And if you still doubt this, that hormone serotonin is there, somewhere in your body, to prove it.

About the Author

K.A.Cassimally is the editor in chief of Astronomy Journal and Astronomy Journal Ezine. He is also the co-founder of the RCPL Astronomy Club.

He is also Senior Columnist at BackWash.com and Columnist for bbc.co.uk h2g2 The Post where he writes 'Not Scientific Science'.

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Shouldn't a Senator's Word Mean Something

Today marks 101 days since John Kerry promised, on national TV, to sign form SF-180 and release his military records.

To help the senator out, you could fax him a copy of the form. It’s only 3 pages, and is available online here.

Here are the fax numbers for the senator’s offices:

Washington D.C. - (202) 224-8525
Boston, MA - (617) 248-3870
Springfield, MA - (413) 736-1049
Fall River, MA - (508) 677-0275

If you don’t have access to a fax machine, you can e-mail the fax by using a service like MaxEmail or eFax. Or just go to the nearest Kinko’s.

To avoid any confusion, you might include a cover letter which mentions the senator’s promise, 101 days ago, to sign form 180 and release his military records. Please be polite.

Today is Wictory Wednesday. Every Wednesday, hundreds of bloggers ask their readers to donate to an important Republican campaign.

If you’re a blogger, you can join Wictory Wednesdays by e-mailing wictory@blogsforbush.com. You'll be added to the Wictory Wednesday blogroll. You'lll also be sent a reminder e-mail every Wednesday, explaining which candidate or cause to support that day.

You can find the list of blogs currently participating in Wictory Wednesdays here.

In Order to See the Rainbow

I received this in e-mail from my Uncle. It is not my creation and the copyright belongs its original creator. That being said if anyone can tell me the origins of this piece please let me know so I can give credit where credit is due.

One rainy afternoon I was driving along one of the main streets of town, taking those extra precautions necessary when the roads are wet and slick.

Suddenly, my daughter, Aspen, spoke up from her relaxed position in her seat. "Dad, I'm
thinking of something."

This announcement usually meant she had been pondering some fact for a while, and was now ready to expound all that her six-year-old mind had discovered. I was eager to hear.

"What are you thinking?" I asked.

"The rain! ;" she began, "is like sin, and the windshield wipers are like God wiping our sins away."

After the chill bumps raced up my arms I was able to respond.

"That's really good, Aspen."

Then my curiosity broke in. How far would this little girl take this revelation? So I asked... "Do you notice how the rain keeps on coming? What does that tell you?"

Aspen didn't hesitate one moment with her answer: "We keep on sinning, and God just keeps on forgiving us."

I will always remember this whenever I turn my wipers on.

Isn't it distressing to know that when you forward this message you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it to them.

Funny how we can be more worried about what other people think of us than what God thinks of us.

In order to see the Rainbow, you must first endure some Rain.

The Holy Grail of Science

by Paras Chopra

Imagine playing football at the age of 239 with your grand-grand-grand children. Imagine donating blood at the age of 172. Imagine traveling into an inter-galactic spaceship to the andromeda galaxy. Imagine not getting common cold at all. And imagine not having to see those AIDS awareness ads because AIDS being a history, taught in Medieval History-101. And imagine living to see Indian football team qualify for FIFA world cup. No, you are not being taken to utopia; instead, I’m trying to propel your minds towards the future, which is nearer than ever before.

The fear of death is the most common of the all phobias we know. No one wants to die. To imagine death is the worst punishment one can ever give. History has seen many heroes abandoning their quests just because they feared death. People may spend their fortune on treatments without guarantees of 100% recoveries. Now the question arises, if death is so dreadful then why it is so common?

Death rides following reasons:

* Hunger: This factor is a major cause of deaths in poorer nations. There are many organizations working to free the food distribution process from bureaucracy but a lot of work still needs to be done.

* Accidents: These are mainly caused to negligence and carelessness. In this high-tech convergent world everyone is busy with his personal bunch of gizmos, unaware of the precautionary measures. This carelessness isn’t safe. In nutshell, people are just too busy.

* Wars: This is the most shameful aspect of human species. Wars can be avoided and with them million of deaths. Only some social engineering is needed. Governments spend most of their GDP on defense research. This money can be put into more useful bio-researches leading to fewer diseases and lower mortality rate.

* Natural disasters: The inevitable factor. At present we can only predict but can not prevent natural disasters. We are left at mercy of our so called Mother Earth unless we colonize other planets.

* Ageing: Evolution made the humans mortal. Our bodies are just here to reproduce and nurture our kids to a level where they can reproduce. Then, biologically, our bodies become worthless – Telomeres have to shed its size. They are not required by the evolutionary process anymore, so we die.

* Diseases: Survival of the fittest. Charles Darwin gave the world this famous theory. It implied that we survive to be fit. And if we’re diseased we cannot be fit. When those tiny pathogenic agents attack our body we fall sick. This is because they are genetically fitter than, us, the mighty humans. Our bodies were not made to fight these agents and we fall prey to their attack. There are two ways to attack the disease. Either change our bodies (genome) to be able to fight or hinder the functioning of the agents or eliminate them. Either way it is difficult so, presently, we are left with our sickening genome which we are unable to edit. Its mutation is left to evolution alone.

Well accidents can be prevented if awareness about their prevention is spread. This is the area where mass media has to play its role. And Wars can be prevented by peace movements and social engineering. And as far as natural disasters are concerned we can only plead to engineers to make structures safer. It is their duty to make structures capable of coping with the natural disasters suffering minimum damage to lives. But, it is the last two factors namely ageing and diseases, which are being described as The Holy Grail of Science.

As we all know, our bodies are governed by genes which control just about everything about our body. Be it our physical appearance or resistance to diseases or intelligence (much debated) or inner functioning, every damn thing is controlled by our genes. It is said that if we can control genes we can control the course of evolution. It is like riding the car of evolution, the human species being driver, passenger being earth and genes as its steering wheel.

It has been scientifically proven that every cell in our body has a type of biological clock called telomere. This clock tells the cell when to stop dividing. If a cell is unable to reproduce then new cells are not born, hence our body dies. This is called ageing. The scientists today are trying to edit the genes thus instructing cells to make longer telomere or altogether abandon the concept of telomere which can result in indefinite life span. If scientists are ever able to achieve this then it could bring a revolution. Then we’ll be able to keep body deteriorating effects of age at a bay and enjoy the full energetic life of youth at the age of 100. But even then, job would be half done.

The next front of the battle would be ‘Diseases’. Even if we’re able to live up to 100 or more then what will keep our body protected from all those silly disease causing agents? The current method of medication will become useless very soon as more and more virus, bacteria, etc. are developing immunity against our body mechanism and the medicines. The fact that these agents mutate very rapidly makes them survive longer and longer. But the humans have not changed at all. We are not able to mutate/change naturally as rapidly as these agents. So, it proves to be a disadvantage to us.

One way to get over this issue is to change our genes artificially. As a positive note the complete human genome has been mapped and now it is the duty of the genetic engineers to make use of it and find a way to develop a fool-proof mechanism against these agents. Once we do this we can have very own personalized medicines or would be requiring no medicines at all. The personalized medicines will work in coordination with our immunity system. It would change the immunity system to make it capable of immunizing us to all new pathogens which our body does not know of. Then slowly, according to survival of the fittest, all the pathogens will be wiped out of existence.

The infinite life span raises many ethical questions. Also, genetic engineering has raised moral/ethical issues world wide. But it is for socialists and politicians to sort out these issues. Scientists only know one way, which is the future. No matter how hard these politicians try to prevent them from achieving this but one day or the other they will achieve this. And then we will live indefinitely and who knows this breakthrough might happen within our lifetime. And after that, we see Indian soccer team win FIFA world cup in 2147 AD.

About the Author

Paras Chopra was born in Patiala, Punjab, India on 3rd June 1987. His interests lie in subjects ranging from Nanotechnology to Biotechnology to Artificial Intelligence.
His goal in life is to achieve immortality. Visit him at his site.

What a Parent Must Do to Stop Online Predators

by Alexandra Gamanenko

To monitor or not to monitor kids online -- that's a question millions of parents face. On the one hand, software for monitoring kids' online behavior is a relief for ever-busy Moms and Dads. On the other hand, parents should be very careful when relying on technology in such a delicate matter as parental control.
Teens can freely access the Internet from computers at school, at their friends' homes and in public places such as libraries and even from cell phones and video game consoles. Internet is everywhere, that is why kids and teenagers (and their parents, too) should be well aware of its dangers to avoid them.

Here are some figures from the telephone survey made by the Pew Internet and American Life Project:

65% of all parents and 64% of all teens say that teens do things online that they wouldn't want their parents to know about.

These "things" usually means visiting sites parents find "questionable" or "inappropriate", for example, so-called adult content. And, of course, chatting online.

What kids say in chat rooms, whom they communicate with and what they post on web logs and other public Internet places can get them into much more serious trouble than just viewing porn.

81% of parents of online teens say that teens aren't careful enough when giving out information about themselves online and 79% of online teens agree with this.

Sometimes teenagers post online their first and last names, postal addresses, phone numbers, pictures and give lots of personal information about themselves. It enables a predator easily identify and find this teen.

Unfortunately, sex predators teem in cyberspace. Sometimes they immediately start sexually explicit conversations with children. If a kid or a teen is forewarned and taught to end such a conversation immediately, he or she is relatively safe, except for moral damage from such a talk.

But there are others. They gradually allure their future victims by attention, affection, kindness, and even gifts. These individuals usually devote much time, money, and energy to this process. They listen to childrenand pretend to empathize with their problems. They even are aware of the latest music, hobbies, and interests of children. Some time later this person may succeed in arranging a face-to-face meeting with the kid -- you can guess what for.

Such crimes are on the rise, so there are now even special units where law enforcement officers pose as children in chat rooms to lure predators into a trap.

The problem is so serious that Federal Bureau of Investigation had to launch Crimes Against Children (CAC) Program in 1997. So every parent should read and memorize tips from "A Parent's Guide to Internet Safety" http://www.fbi.gov/publications/pguide/pguidee.htm

There are rules any teen should learn by heart: don't believe everything they are told on-line, never reveal your name, age, birthday, graduation year, nickname or any other personal information while chatting.

Parents should talk to their children about online dangers. Moms and Dads must encourage their sons and daughters tell them about their online acquaintances, without fear of being scolded of punished.

But should parents use monitoring software? It's a difficult question. Software for parental control is a useful tool, only if applied right.

My opinion is that monitoring software is "strong medicine". Like any medicine, it has its own side effects that can be worse than the disease. Any medicine, if overused, can do harm. Computer monitoring is the last resort, when all the other means are exhausted. Don't do it just because you think you should.

Using monitoring software will be appropriate if you feel you are losing control of the situation, or have lost it already.

For example, your teenage son or daughter seems to be completely withdrawn from family.

You don't know his/her friends well enough--maybe you even haven't seen them and doubt whether they exist at all. You have no idea whom he/she is chatting with. Your teenager receives phone calls from people you don't know or is making long-distance calls to numbers you don't recognize.
Your son or daughter gets letters, gifts or packages from people you haven't heard about.

Every day he/she spends hours on the computer, especially at night. when you enter the room he/she changes the screen. Maybe you found pornography on your child's computer. If your child uses an online account that belongs to someone else, you also should be alarmed.

Don't keep the computer in your child's bedroom. In fact, nearly three-quarters of home computers are located in a place like living room, according to the survey. A wise thing to do. If your child uses the Internet in a living room, it is easier to watch what he or she is doing online.

And, of course, there is a great variety of monitoring software products. Their purposes may vary from simply recording the time the computer is on/off to logging every keystroke your kid makes. Use one of them if you are sure it is absolutely necessary. But remember that your kid might be more technically savvy than you. Lots of them can erase their traces.

At any case, you must let your kid know you care for his or her safety -- both offline and online.

About the Author

Alexandra Gamanenko currently works at Raytown Corporation, LLC -- an independent monitoring and anti-monitoring software developing company that provides various solutions for information security. Learn more -- visit the company's website

Kids are Full of Surprises

Neither this list or the story following are my personal stories and the copyright belongs to the original creator whomever that is. I do however have three kids that are beyond this age so I can laugh at this list (my youngest is a boy 8 years old, so I may yet be living out some of these).

For those who have children beyond this age, this is hilarious.
For those who have children this age, this is not funny.
For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.
For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.

THINGS I'VE LEARNED FROM MY CHILDREN

1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000sq. foot house 4 inches deep.
2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 3 year old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.
5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6. The glass in widows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh", it's already too late.
8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9. A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year old man says they can only do it in the movies. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
10. Certain LEGOs will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old.
11. Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
12. Super glue is forever.
13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15. VCRs do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens.
20. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy.
21. It will however make cats dizzy.
22. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

The mind of a six year old is wonderful. First Grade...true story.

One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her class. She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to accumulate the building materials for his home. She read "...and so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow full of straw and said, 'Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that straw to build my house?'"
The teacher paused then asked the class, "and what do you think that man said?" One little boy raised his hand and said, "I think he said 'Holy S#!*!! A talking pig!" The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes...